6 Video Games I Would Love Remastered Versions Of

 Quite a few older games have gotten remastered versions and it has made me think about what other games need a remastered version. So here's a list!

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic 

This game renewed my love of video games after a decade of not being interested in them. It was also my introduction to RPGs. And gods do I want a remaster of it. I still play the original happily, but to have a remastered version with updated graphics and some new tweaks would be the best thing ever. And I know ASPYR did an update for Switch. I have it.  But as far as I can tell it is the original game for Switch. They even canceled the second game's DLC which was gonna be a bunch of cut content which I forgot was a thing and am now sad about.

 One request for a remaster, can I have a "holster weapon" button? I look like a tool walking around with my swords and blasters out all the time.

The Simpsons Hit and Run 

This game was basically Grand Theft Auto, but Simpsons. And it was so great. I honestly just want a re-release of this game for maybe newer consoles. I don't need updated graphics or newer plot bits from the show added. Just give me the same game on something besides PS2. Which I still have and play, but still...

Marvel Ultimate Alliance

I have this game for original Xbox. And there was DLC where I could get Hawkeye. That I missed out on because by the time I learned DLC was a thing, the original Xbox store was shut down. So. I want a remaster so I can get Hawkeye. Because that is all I really care about.

Dragon Age: Origins

There is absolutely nothing wrong with the original. I still play it fairly regularly. Love it to bits. But, hey, gimme a remaster. Everyone else seems to be demanding it, so I’m gonna join the crowd. 

Assassin’s Creed

This game deserves a remastered version for newer consoles. It is such a good game and I would like an updated version. I mean… Didn’t we get a remaster of Assassin’s Creed III? Well, Altair needs a remaster as well. 

The Witcher

I didn’t know the Witcher was a thing until the second or third game was released. And by that point the only place you could get the first game was gog.com. Which I got. But I would love an updated remaster for consoles as well. 

And that's all I got for now. 

See y'all next time.

Hating someone is giving them too much, just leave them alone. 

~ Henry Rollins

Assassin's Creed: Revelations by Oliver Bowden

Assassin's Creed: Revelations by Oliver Bowden

Book Warnings:

Major character death

Graphic depictions of violence

Spoilers for both game and book ahead.

If you played the game, you know what happens in this book. Ezio is older, a little wiser, and looking for Altaïr's library. Well, not so much looking for it. He figured out where that was before the book even started. He just needs some keys to get the door opened. And those damn Templars keep getting in his way.

Oh, and he falls in love while all this is going on. Which, good for him. Ezio deserves the best.

And I spent the entire book wanting to learn Italian. Which... Is pretty average for anything Assassin's Creed. Spent three games wanting to learn Italian cause of Ezio. At least the curse words.

It's been a while since I played the game, but if I remember how the game ended, the book goes past that a bit? I honestly can't remember. The book covers his marriage to Sofia, their children, the death of Leonardo, Ezio naming a successor (A POET?!), meeting Shao Jun, and then, finally, Ezio's death. Which... Made me cry... Rude. 

The book also gives a quick overview of what happened to Altair, his family, and Malik. Which... Most of that I will be pretending didn't happen. My babies deserve happiness and I refuse to think anything but the best happened to them.

There were a few instances that some information was repeated. Information would be mentioned, then a few chapters later the same information would be mentioned again. But that was easily overlooked as the book was well written otherwise and a fun, entertaining read. 

I highly recommend it to anyone that is a fan of the games but needs a little bit more. 

Five hidden blades out of five from me.

6 More of My Most Hated Parts in My Favorite Video Games

Spoilers for Mass Effect 3, Arkham Knight, and Dragon Age 2.

To see this post with some nifty gifs, check out my Tumblr

 Using the Apple of Eden in any of the Assassin’s Creed games.

I came here to stab things, not use some magic object that even after all this time I still can’t fucking figure out.

Okay. It's pretty easy to figure out. Push a button and watch as things happen. But, again, I came here to stab things...

Mordin’s death in Mass Effect 3.

There are a lot of sad deaths in my favorite video games. But for some reason, Mordin’s death still hits me as hard as it did the first time I played the game. And even though his death is heartbreaking to me, I always cure the genophage. It’s what he would want. 

Tank battle in Arkham Knight.

I love you Jason. I do. But I am going to shove that fucking tank up your ass piece by fucking piece. 

I think this whole thing is actually called "Destroy the Cloudburst". But... In my head, it's the tank battle. And I hated every minute of it. Especially that moment when I got respawned and got killed before I could even fucking move.

The Murder Trial on Manaan in Knights of the Old Republic.

It was just all-around fucked up and I hated every second of it.  I think I got executed a few times trying to figure out what I was supposed to do. It was hell and I hated it. Can I go back to Dantooine and solve that murder? It was way less annoying.

All That Remains in Dragon Age 2.

I’m not a huge fan of Leandra Hawke, she was cool, but not one of my favorite video game

mothers (yes, I have a list of those). But I haaaated this quest. The first time I thought if I just went fast enough, solved it quick enough, it would be okay. But it wasn’t. It never was. And no matter how many times I play this game, my brain always seems to think if we just go fast enough we can save our video game mom. And every time we fail. And we’re sad.

Anytime I have to drive/pilot/be an eagle/ride a horse.

Oh gods. There is a reason I do not play racing games. It just ends badly for all involved. Mostly me. 

Remember that bit in Assassin's Creed III when you were an eagle and had to just simply fly and not hit too many trees? Guess who hit too many trees? Me.

I got three canoes stuck in Assassin's Creed: Liberation the first time I played that game. Three. Within in an hour of learning I could use a canoe.

I loved the MAKO in Mass Effect just because I could blame my bad driving on the clunky controls. But really, it was me.

I think I used the mounts in Dragon Age: Inquisition twice. Mostly cause I couldn't fucking ride a horse. Or any of those other cool-looking mounts that were offered. I did get all of them. They just... hung out at Skyhold...

6 Random Bits I Love in Video Games

 Note: Go here for a version of this post with gifs.

In case it hasn’t become obvious, I love video games. They’re fun and relaxing and let me live out a fantasy world where I actually do shit instead of staring at a wall thinking about doing shit. This is a list of random bits in video games that make me all warm and fuzzy inside.

Slight spoiler for Mass Effect 3. 

The end. I get such a feeling of accomplishment when I finish a game. I am easily distracted. I lose focus on games a lot. So when I get all the way through and those end credits start rolling, I’m so proud of myself. And usually sad that it’s over. But mostly proud.

Petting Toby in Crimes and Punishments: Sherlock Holmes. If you put an animal in a video game and I’m gonna try to pet it. And petting Toby was even better because you got an achievement/trophy for it!

Meeting any historical figure in the Assassin’s Creed games. I’m a history nerd so I squeal like a fan-girl any time a historical figure strolls onto my screen while playing the Assassin’s Creed games. My favorite is probably Leonardo da Vinci. Though I sadly have only played up until Assassin’s Creed 3 and I’m probably missing out on a lot of historical figures. But I doubt Leo will ever get too low on my list of favorite real people in an Assassin’s Creed game. Even with all those pirates in Black Flag. Oh gods, I need to focus and get to that game. Need me some pirates in my life.

Getting anything accomplished in any Elder Scrolls game. Seriously. I get so distracted by everything in those games. I get lost when I can’t fast-travel to where I need to go. There’s always skulls and books I need to collect for my house. Random people are just standing around ready to send me on some random fetch quest. Children to adopt. It’s shocking that I get anything done. 

Using the Renegade Option to kill Kai Leng in Mass Effect 3. Fuck that guy. I hate him. I tend to play video games as a “Nice Guy”. Wait. No. I’m not a Nice Guy. I play as a good person. I avoid the mean dialogue options. I help every annoying little NPC that happens to mention needing help within my hearing range. I do the nice thing. All the time (well, most of the time). But the second that renegade option popped up I was on it. Fuck you, Kai Leng. Have fun in hell.

Getting an achievement/trophy. I’m not that focused on achievements. I spend pretty much no time trying to collect them. I think the only one I went out of my way to get was that Calendar Man one in Arkham City. Which was creepy as fuck, by the way. Loved it. But yeah. Achievements/trophies are not my goal when I play a video game. But gods if I don’t get all excited and make embarrassing noises when I get one.

6 of My Most Hated Parts of My Favorite Video Games

(also posted on my Tumblr - with gifs!)

Video games are great. I love video games. Love a day of just relaxing and playing a nice video game. Until I get to these parts. Then there is screaming and tears and just an overwhelming sense of dread. 

Okay, that’s not entirely true. I’m being dramatic. But fuck, do I hate these parts in some of my favorite video games.

There be spoilers ahead for Dragon Age: Origins mostly.

The Broken Circle in Dragon Age: Origins 

This part has become less hated by me the more often I play it. The first time I spent days stuck in the Fade. Screaming mostly. Now I can bust it out in a few hours with only the occasional scream. But even going in knowing I can easily make my way through it, and deal with the enemies thrown at me, every time I step into the Circle Tower my brain just starts screaming. 

Orzammar in Dragon Age: Origins 

Unlike the Fade, Orzammar still takes me days to get through. There’s all the actual Orzammar bullshit, plus the Deep Roads. Dear gods… The Broodmother. And that boss fight against Branka. Every time I think about playing Origins I just remember that part and start screaming. And then, after all that you get to help decide on a new king. Because of course you do. Bhelen is kind of a dick (and if you’re playing as a dwarf noble, even more of a dick). Harrowmont seems like a good dude. Ah, but you find out at the end of the game that Bhelen is probably the best option for the good of Orzammar. Fuck Orzammar. May the darkspawn take you. 

Night Terrors in Dragon Age 2 

And we’re back in the Fade. This time the Fade part takes an hour or so of gameplay. Fairly straightforward and almost easy. At least until all your companions start betraying you and you have to fight them. Except for Anders, which is shocking to anyone who has played this game to the end. So the best option is to just ditch everyone before heading into the Fade. Take Anders if you are feeling lonely, but Justice takes over and is kind of a dick. And make sure you say the right things to that sleeping guy or he’ll go a little crazy and beg for death. Besides all that, super fun times in the Fade.

Arrival DLC for Mass Effect 2 

As this is DLC, it is completely optional. And if you do complete it, the payoff is pretty decent in the third game. Not decent enough for me to have played this more than once. Fuck the Batarians. Not really, sorry guys. But ugh, this mission. And for reference on how much I hate this mission, I play all the other DLC (but the multiplayer stuff… Stephy no play multiplayer…). I get traumatized by Overlord every time, and cry every time. I play the fucking Hammerhead missions, guys! The Hammerhead! But Arrival? I look at that entry in my journal and just nope right out of there. 

Any timed mission in all the Assassin’s Creed games 

I am not good with timed missions. I turn into a complete moron if there is a timer onscreen. I forget how to play the game completely and can’t remember what button is what. Even though I was kicking ass right before the timer appeared. But for some reason, they seem worse in the Assassin’s Creed games. Races and such never get done if I don’t have to do them. They’re just constant little reminders on my map about how I am a failure at running. And if a main mission has a timed portion, you better believe it is going to take me at least five times to get past it. 

The vaults in Mass Effect: Andromeda 

I fucking hate these things. I start panicking the second I step into one and it just gets worse the longer I am in one. The worst part is the fucking death clouds. I think I have been killed by those maybe twice. And each time it was something silly. You know, shit like getting stuck behind a barricade because I didn’t see it for whatever reason. But as soon as I hit that button for the death cloud I start screaming and don’t stop until I am on the planet’s surface again. A close second to the worst part of these things is some of the puzzles I have to go through just to get to the death cloud. There are a couple that I cannot do without looking up a walkthrough. Though, in the game’s defense, sometimes I just get frustrated trying to do puzzles and give up earlier than I should. Then the next time I play I’m like “Oh yeah! Now I get it!” But still, I hate them. Fuck the vaults. May the darkspawn take them. Wait. Wrong Bioware game. 

That’s it from me on this subject. For now. I mean, there are more bits in games I hate. I just hate so much…

Stephy's Recommendations While You're Stuck Inside

So, you’re stuck not doing social activities for the foreseeable future. Man, that sucks. I mean, for other people. I spent years avoiding social activities so I’m prepared for this. And for those less prepared, I got a list of random cool things I’m into that I highly recommend checking out.

Read my stuff on AO3. What? Self-promotion is healthy or some shit. Rrrrrrrreeeeeeaaaaaad myyyyyyyy shhhhhhhiiiiiiiiit.

Elementary. For those that don’t know, it is a Sherlock Holmes show with some slight twists on the classic. The main one being Watson is a woman. A beautiful, badass woman that deserves all the praise. Even Sherlock thinks so. It is by far my favorite Sherlock Holmes related thing that isn’t the original books. Available on Hulu.

Schitt’s Creek. This show is simply the best. It focuses on the Rose family, who were once super rich, but then their business manager screwed them over and they lost everything. They end up in Schitt’s Creek, some small town with no culture. Or much of anything really. It is funny, heartwarming, and has one of the best love stories I have ever seen on screen. I also feel this show is appropriate for kids around 11 and above. If you don’t mind them hearing some “bad” language. I’m gonna make Short Round watch it while she’s off school. First five seasons are on Netflix (sixth season is still airing).

The Assasin’s Creed series. These games are not only fun, but they’re also educational! Not even joking. You go through history, playing as different assassins. And the historical stuff that’s mentioned? It’s mostly true. Just take out the assassins and templars, and yep, that’s pretty much what happened. I highly recommend starting at the beginning, but if that’s not feasible, find a video that explains what happens in the games you missed so you don’t miss anything.

Zefrank videos on YouTube. His animal videos are some of the best things I have ever seen.

Scared to Death and Timesuck podcasts. So far I’ve just watched the Scared to Death videos, but I fell in love with them about a minute into the first one. Scared to Death is just Dan Cummins and his wife Lynze talking about spooky and scary things. It is great.

Bedtime Stories on YouTube. This channel covers a variety of stories that range from cryptids, mysterious deaths, conspiracy theories, and hauntings and they’re presented as a visual storybook. It’s almost like this guy is reading a bedtime story (eeeehhh, *nudge nudge* I’m hilarious) to me.



What We Do in the Shadows. A vampire comedy. And that is really all the reason you need to watch both the movie and TV show. Oh, how about Taika Waititi? Oh, you want to know what it’s about? Okay, so a group of vampires are being filmed by a documentary crew. Hilarity. Show is on Hulu. I think the movie is on Amazon Prime, not sure.



The Fraction Hawkeye run. Clint Barton is a mess. He’s a disaster. A dumpster fire. But hey, he has a dog. And a protege that might or might not be better than him. Also, Hawkeye vs. Deadpool is great.

Riodanverse books. These are young adult books but work for everyone if a kid is smart (Short Round started reading them in third grade) or the adult isn’t a douchebag (I read and love them). The books start with Percy Jackson and the Olympians, which features a kid, Percy Jackson, dealing with the fact that he is a demigod (a child of a god for those unaware). That set deals with Greek Mythology. Other series that take place in the universe cover other mythologies. I honestly cannot remember what has been covered and what hasn’t as it has become so vast. I remember Egyptian, Norse, Roman… And now there are new writers writing more books that all take place in the same universe. If you watched the Percy Jackson movies, I highly suggest you read the books. They are 6000 times better. If you haven’t watched the movies, I suggest skipping them if you expect them to follow the books.

And that’s ten. Stay tuned cause I might make more recommendations in the future. Okay, I will cause I love talking about cool shit I like.

Everyone stay safe, wash your hands, don’t hoard things and punch anyone that doesn’t respect personal space.