Review: The Force Unleashed

The Force Unleashed by Sean Williams
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

*spoilers ahead*

Fuck this book.

Okay, don't. This book is really good. Really.

Let me start by saying that it's been a while since I've played the game (and I seriously cannot remember if I actually finished it) so there won't be many comparisons to the game. If you want to know how well it follows the game, look somewhere else.

Okay, so this book focuses on Darth Vader's secret apprentice that he had a couple years before the Battle of Yavin. Through most of the book, the apprentice doesn't even have a name aside from Starkiller, which was a codename of sorts given to him. He is sent by Vader to take down spies, traitors and in the beginning of the book, Jedi. A pilot is assigned to fly him around, Juno Eclipse. And, spoiler alert, they fall in love. The Apprentice and Juno, not Vader and anyone. No one loves Vader.

I like how the book detailed the Apprentice's discovery of who he was, and how he turned away from the dark side. And while Juno was a big reason on why he turned away from the Sith, it wasn't like he seen her and went "ya know, the dark side isn't cool..." Which, honestly, wouldn't have made sense. Juno is an Imperial pilot. She believes to her core that the Empire is right and the Jedi were traitors and deserved what they got. So him being a Sith was not a turnoff for her. He could have just kept swinging his lightsaber and killing Jedi and she would have still been fine with it. What pushed their relationship was Vader's betrayal. Well, his supposed betrayal? Wait, let me explain.

So, Vader is sending his apprentice after Jedi that escaped Order 66. And Vader is all "once you're strong enough we're gonna take down Palpatine and rule the Empire". Which, really, does Vader just promise that to anyone he comes across that can use the Force? Anyway, of course Palpatine finds out and he forces Vader to kill the Apprentice. Which Vader does. Supposedly. Vader then locks Juno up, branding her as a traitor. But the Apprentice survives. Vader said it was all a trick and sent him off to find enemies of the Empire to use against Palpatine. Soooo... the Apprentice was ordered to start the Rebellion against the Empire. On the Apprentice's way out, he grabs Juno out of her cell and is like "I need a pilot?"

The rest of the book focuses on the Apprentice working to set up a rebellion. He has to run an errand, save Bail Organa, fight a planet and lie lie lie. Along the way, he finds out who he is and realizes he caught feelings for Juno. That's when he realizes he doesn't want to do this anymore. And after another betrayal from Vader, the Apprentice swoops in, saves the Rebellion and sacrifices himself.

A character I didn't mention but is super important is PROXY. PROXY is the Apprentice's droid companion. No idea what kind of droid he is, but he can take the form of people, and his main programming is to kill the Apprentice. So... they dual a lot. But the Apprentice loves his droid. You can tell. It's really the only friend the Apprentice had.

From what I understand, or remember, or whatever, in the game, you can choose to go dark-side. Which I assume means you don't swoop in to save the rebels... I dunno. I'll watch a YouTube video later.

In my opinion, this is a great book. I love the characters of the Apprentice, Juno, and PROXY. The plot is fantastic and I loved it since I heard about it when the game was released. I remember playing the game, but I also remember not enjoying it. I think the gameplay got to me. Too many of those things where I have to hit a certain button at a certain time and I suck at them, I think. So, being able to read a novelization of it was just perfect for me. I do want to give the game another try though.

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Review: The Mouse on the Mile

The Mouse on the Mile by Stephen King
My rating: 5 of 5 stars



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Review: The Green Mile, Part 1: The Two Dead Girls

The Green Mile, Part 1: The Two Dead Girls by Stephen King
My rating: 5 of 5 stars



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Stephy's Recommendations While You're Stuck Inside

So, you’re stuck not doing social activities for the foreseeable future. Man, that sucks. I mean, for other people. I spent years avoiding social activities so I’m prepared for this. And for those less prepared, I got a list of random cool things I’m into that I highly recommend checking out.

Read my stuff on AO3. What? Self-promotion is healthy or some shit. Rrrrrrrreeeeeeaaaaaad myyyyyyyy shhhhhhhiiiiiiiiit.

Elementary. For those that don’t know, it is a Sherlock Holmes show with some slight twists on the classic. The main one being Watson is a woman. A beautiful, badass woman that deserves all the praise. Even Sherlock thinks so. It is by far my favorite Sherlock Holmes related thing that isn’t the original books. Available on Hulu.

Schitt’s Creek. This show is simply the best. It focuses on the Rose family, who were once super rich, but then their business manager screwed them over and they lost everything. They end up in Schitt’s Creek, some small town with no culture. Or much of anything really. It is funny, heartwarming, and has one of the best love stories I have ever seen on screen. I also feel this show is appropriate for kids around 11 and above. If you don’t mind them hearing some “bad” language. I’m gonna make Short Round watch it while she’s off school. First five seasons are on Netflix (sixth season is still airing).

The Assasin’s Creed series. These games are not only fun, but they’re also educational! Not even joking. You go through history, playing as different assassins. And the historical stuff that’s mentioned? It’s mostly true. Just take out the assassins and templars, and yep, that’s pretty much what happened. I highly recommend starting at the beginning, but if that’s not feasible, find a video that explains what happens in the games you missed so you don’t miss anything.

Zefrank videos on YouTube. His animal videos are some of the best things I have ever seen.

Scared to Death and Timesuck podcasts. So far I’ve just watched the Scared to Death videos, but I fell in love with them about a minute into the first one. Scared to Death is just Dan Cummins and his wife Lynze talking about spooky and scary things. It is great.

Bedtime Stories on YouTube. This channel covers a variety of stories that range from cryptids, mysterious deaths, conspiracy theories, and hauntings and they’re presented as a visual storybook. It’s almost like this guy is reading a bedtime story (eeeehhh, *nudge nudge* I’m hilarious) to me.



What We Do in the Shadows. A vampire comedy. And that is really all the reason you need to watch both the movie and TV show. Oh, how about Taika Waititi? Oh, you want to know what it’s about? Okay, so a group of vampires are being filmed by a documentary crew. Hilarity. Show is on Hulu. I think the movie is on Amazon Prime, not sure.



The Fraction Hawkeye run. Clint Barton is a mess. He’s a disaster. A dumpster fire. But hey, he has a dog. And a protege that might or might not be better than him. Also, Hawkeye vs. Deadpool is great.

Riodanverse books. These are young adult books but work for everyone if a kid is smart (Short Round started reading them in third grade) or the adult isn’t a douchebag (I read and love them). The books start with Percy Jackson and the Olympians, which features a kid, Percy Jackson, dealing with the fact that he is a demigod (a child of a god for those unaware). That set deals with Greek Mythology. Other series that take place in the universe cover other mythologies. I honestly cannot remember what has been covered and what hasn’t as it has become so vast. I remember Egyptian, Norse, Roman… And now there are new writers writing more books that all take place in the same universe. If you watched the Percy Jackson movies, I highly suggest you read the books. They are 6000 times better. If you haven’t watched the movies, I suggest skipping them if you expect them to follow the books.

And that’s ten. Stay tuned cause I might make more recommendations in the future. Okay, I will cause I love talking about cool shit I like.

Everyone stay safe, wash your hands, don’t hoard things and punch anyone that doesn’t respect personal space. 

Shows/Movies I Would Watch the Fuck Out Of

A “reality” show like Keeping Up With the Kardashians with Bruce Wayne, his butler and his hoard of children. I still want them all to be costumed vigilantes. I mean, except for Alfred. He don’t need no costume to kick ass. And since they still have their nightlife going on, I want the occasional hint about it and them all trying to play it off. “Oh, that domino mask? I… uh… go to orgies where we wear masks… Yes…” “Jason never died. He got lost in the Manor and Bruce just overreacted. He does that sometimes. He’s very dramatic.” Shit… I’m going to start this as a fan-fiction and never finish it, I just know it....     

A sitcom with Marvel characters. And I don’t want it connected to the MCU. I want something like the fan-fics where the original MCU Avengers live in the Tower and hijinx ensue. I don’t want constant battles with villains. Maybe the occasional villain appearance, but I would be more happy with that shit happening off-screen. Just mentions of how they took down Loki or Doctor Doom or whoever. I want something sort of like the Avengers Assemble that was on Disney, but less villain fighting and more Thor eating all the pizza bagels. Or was it pickles? Did Hawkeye eat all the pickles? Whatever, doesn’t matter. What matters is a group of heroes living together and acting like children. 

A Batman origins movie about him capturing Calendar Man focusing more on the detective side of things than the fighting. I want a more of a detective type Batman movie. He is an excellent detective, but most people focus more on his outfit and the punching. And the gadgets. Also, I need Calendar Man in a movie. He is, in my opinion, one of the scariest Bat-villains because he is too much like a real-life serial killer. Him and Zsasz, but Zsasz had his time in live-action so I want Calendar Man to have his turn.

Ancient Gods in modern times. I don’t know what I want them to do, I just know I want them in modern-day acting like normal people. 

A Sliders type show with comic book characters going through all the alternate timelines. Okay, for those that have never watched Sliders, it’s about this young guy who somehow accidentally (or maybe it was on purpose, I can’t remember) built this gadget that let him hop (or slide) dimensions. It ends up that him, his best friend, a college professor (John Rhys Davies, best part of the show) and some random lounge singer all end up getting stuck hopping dimensions trying to get back to their dimension. Now, I want something like that with comic characters, but each dimension is a dimension from comic books. Which I think has probably been done before in comics, but I want it in a TV show form. I can’t stop thinking that Clint Barton being involved heavily. Probably because he’s my favorite and I tried to write a story like that and Clint was one of the characters that got stuck. Maybe someday I’ll finish it. Jason Todd would work well for a DC version.. 0o0o0o0o0o I should write that. Or see if anyone else has. Aside from that version I read where LEGO Jason goes through different universes, which was good, but now I need more.

A character with a shoulder angel and shoulder devil. Every time they are faced with some sort of moral issue, time stops and the little guys appear and argue with them about what to do. And I don’t mean big things. I want those guys popping up constantly during the character’s day. Maybe the character gets chosen for this because they are a huge jerk, and that gets Satan all tingly, and God is like, “hold on… That’s not good…” So they chat and decide to bet over if the character can change their ways or not if given help. They each send a representative and watch as it all plays out. This would probably work better as a movie.

Sitcom with supernatural creatures. I was thinking about a group of supernatural beings working at a Walmart type place, mostly because my brain keeps going back to this Tumblr post I’ve seen quite a few times about how Walmart was created for vampires. They’re always open, the people greeters invite you into the store, etc. But, it could be fun. Watching managers making sure they have enough coverage for full moons, telepaths using their powers to figure out what the customers are demanding, and other shit like that.

Golden Girls 2.0. I have this whole plan for Golden Girls 2.0. Okay, first off, Rose is back. We need those Saint Olaf stories and Betty White. We do. She will kind of take over the Sofia role as in she is the oldest woman in the house. The rest of the roommates will consist of the daughters of the original characters. Dorothy, Rose and Blanche each had at least one daughter, so I would like one daughter from each of the original ladies (Dorothy only had one daughter, Blanche had two and Rose had three) to just in together at some point. I don’t have a solid plan for why. Maybe throughout the years they had all met and communicated for whatever reason and then decided to just carry on the tradition. 

Riordan-verse TV series. Seriously. I need all (and I do mean all of them) those books done as a TV series. And done fucking right. Not like the movies they made. Which, I really enjoy those movies, but they are so far from the original material that I can’t even think about the books when I watch them.

A show about average citizens of Gotham city (this was Ryan’s - find him on Tumblr and Twitter idea, but I totally agree). Maybe a group of college kids going to Gotham University. Have one or two be locals and one or two be from somewhere else. Someone should definitely be from Metropolis. Also, it needs to be a comedy. I don’t need any more hero drama. And they have to call attention to the weird fog and darkness of Gotham at least once. I would prefer once every few episodes, but let’s not overdo it. 

Well, that’s all I got for now. Anyone else got cool ideas for TV shows or movies?

Review: The Institute

The Institute by Stephen King
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

It made me cry. Rude.

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